As I have known for a few years, I can be and sometimes am my own worst enemy. I know what I want to do, but I don't always know when/how/where those things will work out.
My biggest aspirations are:
1) to be a successful agency represented plus size model @ a size 16
2) to be a lawyer and eventually a judge
3) last but NOT least to be the best Mom I can be and raise my son
So it is very simple. I can have it all and I will. Just not all at the same time. But something tells me that if modeling was not meant for me, I wouldn't still have the passion for it that I do. I wouldn't continue to think about it every day and be so into fashion. I can feel it. 2012 will be my year. At 24 years old, I will relaunch and reboot my modeling career so that I can truly do one of the things I feel I was meant to do. I will probably move back to NYC and I will work my ass off to model and to be the best law student and eventually best lawyer I can be.
I realize that I do LOVE makeup, but it is a hobby of mine. Not a passion. I am passionate about doing it, but I cannot see myself doing it for years to come or the majority of my life. Now I know what I want to do and where I want my life to go, it is up to me to make it happen...
You make me want to start my own blog too. I'm so sick of holding everything in. It sucks to always be the bad guy in the story. I use to be able to speak my mind on FB. But someone from my church told me I shouldn't do that because I'm a leader at my church and I understand that but I can't pretend like my life is perfect.
ReplyDeleteI think we always got along because we always wanted more for ourselves than what we currently have. I'm so sick of the bills and the first born responsibility and it feels good to say that without feeling like an asshole.
I think I will just start a diary to get my thoughts out but still be able to keep my privacy.