What To Do?

I have had much to think about in the past few days...I have had conversations with Mom & Dad and have been very introspective lately. I feel something off/out of balance with my life and I'm not sure what it is or how to shake it. I feel like for a few months, I'll have it together and be motivated and driven and seemingly have things figure out, but then all of a sudden I lose steam and somehow get lost in the shuffle as well.

I'm feeling like I don't even know which direction to go in anymore...
there are logical directions: make money doing something I truly enjoy, wait a few years to go to law school, maybe never have a modeling career? Be a breadwinner and provider like I'm supposed to and  be...miserable? I was sure at one point in life that I could do it ALL. Now I'm not so sure. I'm very uncertain about everything...wtf can I do besides pray?

It came to a decision I have to begin to make on Friday. I love makeup, I enjoy doing it, I enjoy learning about it and helping people. But I'm not 100% sure I can be happy for YEARS to come doing it. It will always be something that I enjoy doing, but maybe it falls into the hobby category along with poetry. Something  I truly enjoy, but may not be meant to be for a life career.

About law school: Next year is not going to happen, but I think I should do it in 2013...I realized what am I waiting for? I'm tired of just working jobs. I want a meaningful career. I also realized that I will never be a "rich" lawyer and I actually don't really have a problem with that. My reasons for wanting to be a lawyer: I have always loved to help people. I used to volunteer. I enjoying bridging cultural and language gaps, I enjoy the satisfaction of truly helping people and changing "the world" even if it's just one person's life. I think that I will be a passionate and just lawyer. I am truly committed to helping families and kids, which is why I'd love to be a family court judge or work in juvenile justice...
 

There are just so many things to consider and I only have my ENTIRE life riding on my decisions. Save for meeting a few people in my life I have no regrets of any decisions I have made. All I know is that I want to be a better person and I want to work in a place where I can have personal and emotional fulfillment along with being able to make a change. But the adventurer in me wants to see the world, the country at least, and travel and be on the move as I always have. *sigh* I really don't know what to do anymore. But there is so much riding on my decisions...My future, Poops' future and yeah...I don't know what this really all means! I am in a million different directions going 1000 mph and i need the emergency break STAT!!! :/