Me and my Poopster will remain in NYC...that is until the sh!t hits the fan and things get too real...lmao j/k But I felt compelled to make this decision based on so many things. Living your dreams is about taking risks, educated ones, but risks none the less. If, when I have tried everything I can do and it still yields no results, only then will I return home. I love my parents and know that they want the best for me, but this is my life, our life and most importantly now Liam and I are my family unit. Everything I do for me/us is because I know in the future it will directly affect him. I don't know what the ultimate outcome of my decision will be and I know there will still be hard times, but in my heart this is what I feel I need to do.
And yes, Dad flipped a sh!t, but we all knew that was going to happen. I understand where he is coming from although I know he thinks I don't. I just don't know if my Dad has ever been this passionate about something or ever this brave (or stupid -depends who you ask) to take this risk. It's not like I'm just diving in with no direction. I know who I am, who I want to be and where I want to go. I know I won't have the physical and monetary support of my parents, but what I do have is everything they taught and a natural fighter instinct I inherited form my Mom.
I am no stranger to hard work and if what I am doing now will allow Liam to go to private school, allow me to get my JD/MFA, give me the opportunity to model and be an MUA, be financially successful, work for myself and at the end of the day still be a good mom, it's worth it to me. I don't want to realize when I'm 40 that I didn't chase my dreams and have nothing to show for it. Success to me is doing the things you love with the people you love and being able to take care of those you love. When it's all said and done, I want to be the one taking care of my Mom and Dad, cuz it's what they did/do for me.
I choose to stay because I don't want to look back on this and have any type of regret. I had a child too young, something I don't regret. I chose to stay here through my pregnancy and the stress surrounding it and I have no regrets. I damn near killed myself finishing my last 2 semesters of undergrad and subsequently studying for the LSAT and I have no regrets.
So cheers to no regrets, chasing dreams, growing up and the adventures that lie ahead
Signing Off,
FutureLawyerModelMama
It seems like you're pretty confident with your decision and I wish you well. You'll definitely have your moments where you'll want to give up, but you'll prevail. Sometimes I still feel that way, but I always overcome whatever hardship comes my way.
ReplyDeleteBlessings on your journey. =)