Young Single Mama Series: Mommy Gets Tired, Too

Since this blog is to encompass the many aspects of my life, I realized i have not been devoting much time to really discussing single motherhood. Many suggestions, entries I have to write on this subject are geared towards single moms, but I'm sure can be applied to married mom and moms in committed relationships.

Today's Topic: "Damn, I'm Tired"

Back in 2009 when I was a scared, pregnant 21 year old expectant Mom, I couldn't have fathomed what my life would be like 2 short years later. While I am no expert still on child rearing, I can tell you this: TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF IS JUST AS IMPORTANT AS TAKING CARE OF THAT BEAUTIFUL SON OR DAUGHTER YOU LOVE SO MUCH.

When Liam was born, I thank God for the miracle of being able to have a few choice friends and of course Mom and Dad for ongoing and unconditional support, even though far from us. They helped support me in ALL ways imaginable. I couldn't have made it through the first year of Liam's life without their invaluable aid and advice. While on maternity leave, things were much easier to handle, but once the honeymoon was over and it was back to work and school FT for me, life got much more challenging.

I will tell you some of the things that went to the wayside: my health, my appearance, my happiness to an extent. All because I wasn't exactly sure how to balance things and I was in overdrive. My day went by so fast and was consumed with so many things, sometimes I'd walk out of the house and forget to brush my teeth, put deodorant on or even simple things like comb/brush my hair. I was caught in the moment, trying to be SuperMom/Daughter/Cicely.

I now know that is impractical. I CAN'T do it all alone. At least not expecting results. So I want moms to know this: DO NOT feel guilty for doing things for yourself.

Examples:

taking a nap! - sounds so simple and so small, but this can make a world of difference in your state of mind and how you feel physically

treat yourself - go get your hair done, mani/pedi, read a book alone in the library for an hour, buy some new jeans or new shoes, take a walk outside around the block/to the park for your sanity. It is necessary every once in a while to do these things. You are a mom, but you are a woman, a daughter, wife, girlfriend, sister, friend, human!

frustration is ok- I used to feel bad when I would get agitated with Liam, thinking "what kind of mother does that?" All kinds. I am human, not a robot. When I am frustrated or overwhelmed, I pause and take a few seconds to reflect. "I love Liam. I love myself. Things will be ok". It helps me to regain control

mothering is not an exact science - no one is perfect and there is no one way to raise YOUR child. Do the best job you can do and enlist the help of those close to you and seek their advice. I'm not much of a disciplinarian, but I like sticking to routine for Liam. When we are in sync, it helps me get things together

ask for help or accept it when offered...need I say more?! lol

These are just a few suggestions to get you started! Please leave comments or any more suggestions you might have ! :)