Ok so that was a slight hyperbole, but I'm really f**ked up about Poopie's visit now. The past couple of nights I have had trouble staying asleep. Yesterday I stuffed my face when I was supposed to be doing a cleanse and I can NOT stop thinking about it. I just think it will be so detrimental to him under the circumstances it is happening. Just 'cuz I don't feel like back linking (yeah, yeah I'm lazy I know). A brief summary of the current absentee father: he has not called, spoken to or seen Liam since Thanksgiving and that was only an overnight visit. He has not even made an attempt at contact with him and this visit is supposed to last a week. I don't even know how to tell Liam about this visit. He doesn't recognize his father as "dad", I just feel so helpless. I might fall all the way the hell apart behind this!
I just can't fathom what court in the U.S.of A would do that to a child? He is 2.5 years old and you are forcing him to spend time with people he hasn't seen or heard from in 5 months....I can't stand it. I'm torn up. I may not eat for the entire week. The only upside to that is I might lose some weight, but I digress. I know that when we go to pick up Liam, his separation anxiety issues will be worse than they were last time. He is very particular and sensitive to people leaving him. To make matters worse.We have to meet with the evaluator from court in the middle of the week pick up Liam to do so. It's gonna destroy me again knowing I can't keep him with me and he has to return to them.
Some people may read this and think I am selfish and trying to keep his other family away. Those who know me and this situation know that it is NOT the case. I don't want my son around anyone who is going to treat him second rate. My son deserves love, attention and appreciation in all forms. These people are not equipped to give my son what he needs at all. On top of everything else, his father owes us $1500 in child support arrears. This trip is going to cost me a total of about $1000 (gas, place to stay, metrocard and food), I had to use my tax return money and work EVERY weekend in March to be able to afford this and I'm still going to be broke.When we get home after the trip, I will barely have enough money for gas to last me til my next pay day. I just can't understand how someone could be so selfish and irresponsible and play with my son. My son's life and wellbeing are not games. He is a person, a human, a little boy. He is my son.
I really can't even type about this right now. This is one of my worst nightmare's come true and there is nothing I can do to get out of it! I'm going to have to do a LOT of praying on this one.
Any advice? What would you do.....?
Oh no!!! Don't run away. Don't even type running away because anything you type or say has the potential to be used against you. Girl... I haven't been in your position because the situation with my son's father is so different. He's not involved in my son's life right now and I don't see that happening for the foreseeable future. I'm okay with that and I'm putting things in place so that Aiden can make peace with that. It's not easy though.
ReplyDeleteDoes Family Court know that the trip will cost you money that YOU DON'T HAVE? I really think you could advocate for yourself and have it set up for the father to fund this type of trip. My gut is telling me that since he owes so much in child support, he won't be too happy about funding this type of trip anyway. So yeah.... *wink*
no girl I wouldn't REALLY run away! lol Yeah , I have a creeping suspicion that the court is trying to turn this into a father's rights case or something cuz it makes NO SENSE. The first 2 visits that were supposed to happen, he was supposed to pay for 1/2...NEVER did. So they keep giving him chance after chance and he has still proved to be a TERRIBLE excuse for a father. I dont get it. My lawyer asked for him to pay for half the trip or at least come here to pick him up and I'd go back to retrieve him.the judge shut that ish down! Now if I don't go, I will be in violation of a court order. So we have to wait until May 1 for the next hearing before the judge even becomes aware of that...smh I really just cant. And there are so many other ridiculous details in this case...enough to make u go nuts!
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